Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Thanks to Tate English, a former classmate and another great photog, for a fab pic of a robot that looks how I have been feeling lately!!
Tate English took this pic to test out a film magazine. He took quite a few pics, (check them out here…they’re fun!) and posted this one on Facebook and used it as a icon.
The moment I saw this pic, I thought about how I have been feeling the last few weeks. There have been some serious blows and some major triumphs…
I acknowledge that my heart has been broken and that I was healed beyond having to feed someone else’s need to be needed.
I realized that I was more sinful that I wanted to admit, but I am better than I was when I was called.
I finally walked away from a community, but am walking into a family.
But even in that, because all of that and in spite of that I feel strong…
There is joy here and that sounds crazy and yet it makes perfect sense.
Abba, I am in a great place!
Without You… without Your wisdom and Your Love, I would have found these last few weeks unbearable, as proof of my failure and that I can’t do anything right.
And that’s because without You, I can’t do anything right. Thanks for making me see how strong You are. Thank You for being there and thanks for understanding what I am trying to say here even though I think it’s coming across.
This is my favorite photo of all the ones I took while I was in San Francisco.
It’s a simple shot of a simple street from inside a simple cafe about 6am Pacific time. This same time of morning in Texas, I would have to drive somewhere 15 miles away and find a spot and then sit and eat and drive.
Here, all I needed was a pair of shoes (really, the sidewalks were nasty) a little cash and time to walk. The streets were quiet and still, filled with homes squeezed together so tightly that all there was was their character. On every corner was a restaurant or cafe or boutique of some sort, waiting to be admired and visited. These small little hidden places that were made for walking slowly, looking, touching, and smiling.
I ended up at a small coffee shop called Four Barrels and watched as they roasted beans and pull vinyl records to play as they made my drink. A few blocks back towards the town house, I found this place.
I sat down and just looked out the window as the city woke up.
“Abba, thank You for being in the quiet moments like this. I didn’t need to fill my time with things to make feel needed or important or be busy to avoid feeling lonely… I had You and that was all I needed. It was just the two of us, the way it used to be and I missed that so much. I missed walking with You, spending time with You, and not needing anything else. Thank you for reminding me how sweet time with You is.”